Better know a ball player: Michael Schlact

I came up with this idea to spotlight minor league players after chatting with a few of them on Twitter the past few weeks. These are guys who work hard and dream big and are super appreciative of their fans. It turns out that Splash Hits planned to do something similar, though hers might be more Giants-focused, so expect some cross-blog linkage for those posts.

The first Better Know a Ball Player* is Michael Schlact (Shh-lack). See how much I love you, internet? I found out how to pronounce his last name for you so you wouldn’t have to wonder how badly you’re butchering his name when you talk about him to your best friend.

Michael, a RHP, was drafted by the Texas Rangers in 2004 and has played for a number of different teams since then, including Bakersfield (BAKERSFIELD!). Over 8 seasons and numerous teams, his ERA is 5.23, K/9 is 4.6, and his K/BB is 1.54 (over roughly 843 innings pitched). I started following him on Twitter one night when I got sucked into a baseball player tweetnado (it’s also how I ended up following LoMo again. I can’t stand that guy!) and since then, he’s not proven to be anything but polite, gracious, and in love with baseball.

Things I know from his Twitter: He recently had surgery (shoulder, I believe?), has a blog, and is SUPER into Jesus. And his wife, who is also on Twitter. They are both positive and affirming and seem to adore the crap out of each other. Apparently his wife can cook really well and I wanted to be all creepy the other day and ask for her recipe for this black bean soup she made, but I decided against. No, talking about it on my blog is TOTALLY A BETTER IDEA.

Also: Michael Schlact is 800 feet tall. I would post pictures as evidence but most of the ones I found had death penalties attached, so I’ll just give you the Google search results. Clearly you can see that his legs are the length of a blue whale standing on the shoulders of another blue whale.

Today (January 24) Michael signed with the Southern Maryland Blue Crabs for 2012. While I am all YAY YOU! about this news, because who isn’t relieved when they have a job lined up, I am very bummed because teams like the SMBC don’t ever make it over here to the best coast.** I hope someday Michael’s career brings him a bit closer to northern California. Until then, I’ll just make due with chatting him up on the tweet machine.

*I hope Stephen Colbert doesn’t sue me for altering his Better Know a District series. I’m poor, Mr. Colbert! Just tell me to cease and desist and I will!

**This saddens me more than it should but it’s probably for the best because I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if I were ever surrounded by baseball players from New England.


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