I don’t have kids. I choose to have a dog instead of a child, but I have a lot of friends who have kids. I love their kids, even if I’ve never met them. I think their babies are the most adorable, and I’m exceedingly proud of ‘my kids.’ I really, really don’t have kids.
Today when I came home from Target, I pulled up outside our building because the little table we’ve been eyeing for behind our couch was on clearance and I didn’t feel like lugging it from our parking spot. As I was pulling back into our parking area, I waited off to the side while a big truck dropped someone off. He started backing up, I started moving forward and right out of his way and all of a sudden, a little girl, about 8 or 9, zipped up behind the truck on her little scooter thing, went around the truck to the left WHILE IT WAS MOVING BACKWARD, and just kept on going like nothing had happened. The person driving the truck slammed on their brakes and we both sat there for a moment, flabbergasted.
Friends of mine with children, please please educate them on safety while biking/skating/playing, especially if you live in a shared community like an apartment complex. The kids here play in the parking lot, darting around parked cars and not hesitating before running out into the parking lot. I want them to know that it’s dangerous to run around cars without looking first. I want them to know bike safety and pedestrian safety. I don’t want to see any more near misses when I look out the window.
I am very lazy and am “pressing” my blog post at Fatcersize here on this blog. Because lazy.
Got my ass handed to me…by a treadmill.
Things Franny Hates
Not getting the food she wants
Fireworks, gunshots, loud noises
Things Franny Loves
Real lady talk
Gonna bust out some lady talk here, so if candid lady talk is too much for you, then skip down to the next section. So if you go for 3 years without having a period and then you suddenly start having them again, IT REALLY SUCKS. Like, my back was cranky this morning and I couldn’t figure out why and then BAM! Someone starts stabbing my uterus with an hor d’ouevres fork.
Please send chocolate and ibuprofin to my mouth, STAT.
So exactly how ridiculous is Bryce Harper? There is not a human scale in existence for how ridiculous he is. Nine homers in the first what, 23 games? You know who else is ridiculous? Anyone who is a starting pitcher for the Dodgers. Nine seems to be the magic number this season because guess how many SPs the Dodgers have had in 23 games? Nine! Oh, Dodgers. We feel you.
How’d this get here?
Speaking of starting rotations, the Giants have been pretty unlucky with their pitching staff this season. The most consistent person has been Madison Bumgarner, followed closely by Zito and Lincecum (in my opinion). Matt Cain hasn’t been awful but the outcomes of his games make that hard to believe. Last night in San Diego, Tim Lincecum battled through a second quality start, going into the seventh and retiring 9. NINE. It’s the number of 2013.
*None of these gifs were made by me!
The Giants just won in a walk-off and I don’t know about you guys, but seeing all of the guys pouring out of the dugout, jumping up and down in a big circle, and looking like a bunch of kids just reminds me of the entire post season. All the disappointments, all the missed opportunities and quiet bats, and then the speech and #RallyZito and #RallyEnchiladas and Posey’s grand slam…
I cannot begin to express how glad I am to see that energy carried over into 2013. I LOVE THIS TEAM, Y’ALL.
About a month ago, I discovered that Kong makes these crazy little edible dental chews shaped like…stuff. They have a turkey leg, a cow, a porcupine, and an alligator. I bought Franny an alligator because it was on sale, and she lost her mind over it. A few weeks later, I bought her another one. This one was a cow because they were all out of alligators. She ate that one in the time it took me to take a shower (have I mentioned that it’s a DENTAL CHEW) one morning.
A couple of nights ago, I got her another bacongator but didn’t give it to her until tonight, after our pointless trip to the dog park. (Seriously. There were so many mosquitos and NO OTHER DOGS, so we just walked around for a bit and then came home.)
I threw the bacongator for her to chase. Because she is completely not interested in playing, she’d run to it, try to pick it up (she can’t unless it’s flipped over, because of how it’s curved), and then run back to the couch when she couldn’t. We played this game until she flipped the bacongator and got it in her mouth.
That’s fine. She was happy and preoccupied and not crawling all over either of us, but then I realized that hey, she can’t eat the entire bacongator tonight. She needs to save some. So I took it away.
She’s been following me around, looking at me with these big, sad eyes and right now she’s in the living room, JUDGING ME.
Man, it’s tough being a dog mom.
It’s 9:15pm on a Tuesday night and I’m sitting in our living room with the dog, watching Game 4 of the World Series. The game is tied and Dotel just walked Scutaro with four pitches. I sat down in time to see Buster Posey’s glorious, by the skin of its teeth homerun to tie it up. It’s fun watching him round the bases, finger in the air as the ball sails into the seats. Posey rarely shows emotion on the field and to see him triumphant and satisfied as he rounds first feels like the completion of his recovery.
Baseball starts in less than a week. A very small part of me is afraid that the start date is all a big joke by the MLB and we’ll all be expectant on Monday morning, but there will be no baseball. MLB will tweet “#AprilFoolsSuckas” and there will be a revolt.
Erm…what was I saying? Ah, yes. The start of the season. The start of the season! Real baseball in all its proper places! AT&T Park, garlic fries, McCovey Cove, sunsets, motherfriggin’ seagulls, the smells and sounds and how loud the ‘MVP! MVP! MVP!’ chants will be the first time Posey steps to the plate and and and and aaannnndddddd